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Just Say Thank You:  How To Receive A Compliment With Confidence

In etiquette, lifestyle on December 11, 2019 at 2:54 pm

The other day I was with a friend who complimented someone on her beautiful silver gray hair and, in agreement, I co-signed on the sentiment.  Without hesitation, this person turned the compliment into a self bashing session then proceeded to tell us in so many words that we didn’t know what we were talking about because of our perceived youth and that clearly we were clueless.  Standing there listening to this back and forth, I felt insulted and uncomfortable and walked away, leaving the ladies to continue their fruitless exchange.  

To be on the receiving end of a compliment can be an uncomfortable experience.  And although you may desire the affirmation of others, it can be very easy to downplay, deflect or reject the nice things people say to you.  This behavior can be attributed to various reasons.  For instance, you may have been raised to not bask in the glow of a compliment because doing so can be seen as conceited.  Other reasons can be directly related to one’s level of self esteem. Those with lower self-esteem may struggle with feelings of unworthiness and don’t believe there is good in them for others to see.  For some, they think it makes them look humble if they deflect a compliment.  Fear can also be a factor.  For example, if someone compliments you, perhaps in a work setting, you might feel like you’ve been exposed and are now expected to perform on a level higher than you feel you are able to perform.  In addition, (some) women in particular are conditioned to be apologists, to cower and self depreciate so when we do receive praise, we can sometimes be quick to point out self-perceived flaws. 

Whatever the case, when you downplay, deflect or reject a compliment, you may think doing so is noble, that it makes you look good in others eyes, or that your reaction is no big deal.  This isn’t necessarily the case and in fact can have a negative effect (on the giver).  Rejecting a compliment can do several things:

  • It can be insulting and show that you don’t respect the opinion of the giver.  For example, if Nicole says, “Janet, your photo selection for the team’s latest project is excellent” and Janet responds with “Actually the photos aren’t that great” what Janet is saying is that Nicole is not a good judge of quality or that she lacks the ability to decide what she likes for herself.
  • It can make the giver feel uncomfortable. For instance, if Nicole says to Janet “I love that dress on you” and Janet responds with “I think it makes me look like a beached whale with stumpy limbs and the color accentuates my breakouts” Nicole might feel like Janet’s negative comments about her looks is weird and makes her want to run away.  Besides, why wear something you feel makes you look bad anyway?
  • It can lessen your chances of ever being complimented again by the giver.
  • It can make you appear weak or ungrateful. Compliments show that the giver sees something in you and values you. Downplaying, deflecting or rejecting compliments and praise can lessen your value in the giver’s eyes.
  • It can make you appear fake humble when you might actually be quite self absorbed. 

Instead, here are four things you can learn to do to accept compliments with grace and ease:

  • Just say “Thank You”.  It’s simple and acknowledges the good taste of the person offering the praise.  It may feel uncomfortable but say thank you and leave it at that.
  • Don’t feel obligated to return a compliment especially if it’s not sincere.  You don’t owe a compliment to anyone and please refrain from engaging in a compliment war to ease your personal discomfort.
  • Dont delflect or dilute the compliment with self insults.  Remember it can create a tense and weird interaction.  It’s also unfair to the giver because they don’t need you to unload your insecurities on them.
  • Give credit where credit is due in collaborative situations but still accept and appreciate the positive feedback for your input and participation.

Might there be an ulterior motive when some people compliment you?  Absolutely.  In situations like that, you can still accept the compliment and remain aware, trusting your gut.  There are also times when someone compliments you and you really aren’t sure about what was said.  Try to just “say thank” you and move on.

Are you someone who is comfortable with receiving praise or do you struggle with receiving compliments and praise with grace and ease?  Share your comments below.

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14 Shoe and Bag Trends To Add To Your Fall/Winter Wardrobe

In style on December 9, 2019 at 7:31 pm

Sure it’s the end of 2019 but the cold weather is still in full effect and you may still need to shop for the perfect accessories for your fall/winter wardrobe.

We stil have a few months left in the fall and winter season and there are still items you may still be looking to complete some of your winter looks or to fill in your wardrobe in general. This season’s accessories (shoes, bags, and jewelry) are not only reminicent of decades passed (hello 90’s) but are bold in shape, color and texture.  Shapes exhibit geometric and architectural elements.  Colors are vibrant. Textures are rich, fuzzy, furry and smooth. You can get the season’s hottest trends anywhere- from your favorite online retailers, brick and mortar stores and even the thrift and consignment stores.

Footwear.  This season’s footwear can be worn with pretty much anything.  All you need is a little imagination and inspiration.

Chunky Heels and Square Toe Shoes.  Chunky heels and square toe shoes were the dominating look for footwear in the 90’s. Regardless of how you feel about this particular look, style elements of the 90’s and have made their way back into our lives and onto the timelines of 2019.  Although I have an affinity for pointy heels and toes, chunky heels (square toes) look great paired with cozy sweaters,  wide leg pants and full skirts.

Animal Prints and Skins.  Although these prints never go out of style, have definitely taken center stage this season.  Level up your footwear game of various prints and textures with varying animal prints and skins found on shoes, boots, sneakers and sandals.

Unconventional Heels.  More than ever, shoes are getting an upgrade with unconventional heels that mimic art sculptures like circles and dollar signs.  While this look may not be for everyone, it is definitely a look to consider when shopping for what innovative and different in footwear.

Over The Knee Boots/Slouchy Boots.  Definitely a sexy option for the season.  These boots can be worn with anything, including an oversized belted Blazers a dress or a sweater and leggings.

Mules. When you literally need to slip on a shoe and go and still be stylish, mules are definitely a stylish option.  This seasons options come in different colors, textures, embellishments and heel height and be worn right into the cooler months with fun socks and hoisery.

Purses and Bags.  This seasons’ it bags will do more than hold your stuff.  Ranging in price, style and size, these bags can take take center stage as the focal point of any outfit.

Furry Bags And Purses.  The furry bags of the season will make you want to get cozy and snuggle up.  Talk about having all the feels. Like footwear, the colors and textures are rich and vibrant and will complement many of your favorite looks of th  e season from casual to dressy.

Croc And Embossed Elements.  These textures are super luxe and glossy and have all the sophistication one can take.  croc and embossed elements show up on purses, clutches, totes and even wallets.

Jewelry-Like Details.  Keep it cute and fancy with chains and embellishments that look like jewelry.

Waist Bags.  Do double duty with waist bags that do double duty as your purse.  They are not only good for storing your belongings while you are out and about but can also cinch the waist of any outfit that you are wearing.

Oversized Clutches And Purses.  First off, who said a clutch has to be small?  Not I.  Pillow sized clutches not only hold all of your things but look great tucked under your arm while wearing a casual or sporty outfit.  Sure it may look like you are literally carrying your luggage but that’s your business.

Micro Sized Purses.  If you aren’t one to carry much at all this particular trend might be just right for you.

Bucket Bags.  This style of bag has been around for some time but they continue to make their mark as necessity in many purse collections and this season is no different.

Double Bagged.  Are two purses better than one?  Many designers seem to think so.  Great thing about this trend is that for some you can wear opt to wear just one or both.  

Geometric and Architectural.  These elements show up in the handles and or the bag itself. Juxtapose against complementary colors or as a bold pop against a monochromatic color scheme these bags are sure to up the ante of any look.


8 Fall and Winter Fashion Trends You Need ASAP

In style on December 9, 2019 at 7:30 pm

The fall/winter season is here and you may still need to add some important items to your wardrobe.  In addition to the staples you should already have in your wardrobe consider adding these 9 hot trends seen all over the runways to your wardrobe.

Belted Blazers.  Blazers, especially oversized blazers, are some of the best finishing pieces or toppers to any outfit.  Although blazers are always going to be an essential piece to any wardrobe, adding a belt to a blazer can really make your look pop.  The good thing about this trend is that you most likely already have a few blazers and belts in your wardrobe to get started.  And depending on the length or how bold you are, belted blazers make great dress, especially with an over the knee boot.

Animal Attraction.  Not sure about you but I will never NOT wear leopard print in some way shape or form.  Although this particular print never really goes out of style, we leopard print lovers can take a more frequent walk on the wild side since it has made a resurgence as one of the biggest patterns of the season.  Be bold and wear a leopard jumpsuit with minimal accessories or use this pattern to mix with other prints since it is actually considered a neutral.  If you like to keep your clothing solid, you can always add accessories like purses and footwear in this pattern.

Checks and Plaids.  There has been a resurgence of plaid, especially in suiting and is the  perfect pattern to incorporate into an existing wardrobe.  Purchase various plaid pieces, including flannels, to incorporate into your wardrobe and even if an entire suit is not your thing, consider purchasing one to maximize your wardrobe:  wear the pieces separately or together.  Like leopard print, plaid is good for mixing with other prints.

Bows and Shoulder Pads.  Travel back in time to the 80’s with these two elements.  I love how large bows can add a feminine flair to a look whereas shoulder pads add a structural/architectural appeal to an outfit for a bit more edge.

Capes.  Capes are great alternatives to traditional coats and jackets as the weather starts to get cooler.  More importantly, they make a number of looks in your wardrobe look more glamorous and can work any body type.

Knitwear.  Knitwear trends are showing up everywher, not only in sweaters but in pants, dresses and skirt so.  The options are endless as this seasons knitwear is not only lightweight but comes in a range of tones and can be worn in many ways: draped over the shoulders in the form of a sweater or worn from head to toe.

Colored, Textured and Printed Hoisery. Including socks, hoisery is one of the quickest ways to update an otherwise mundane look.  A far cry from your mothers boring hoisery for work, today’s look includes various pops of color and unique prints and textures to help you express your you style.

Lame, Metallic and Sequins.  Although these finishes (along with sequins) are usually reserved for holiday or special occasions, you really don’t have to wait until these times to get your shine on.  To get your fix, incorporate pieces into your look by mixing with fabrics such denim, knitwear or suede to balance the vibe.

Leather.  Nothing like leather (or the appearance of said material) to make one look and feel real bad ass.  Incorporate pieces such as leather jackets and pants into an existing wardrobe for day and night.  If genuine leather is not for you, you can also consider vegan alternatives.  

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The Rise Of Single Ingredient Skin Care: Does your skin care have to be complex to be effective?

In skincare on December 9, 2019 at 5:15 pm

Simple, effective, and customizable describes the new trend disrupting the skin care industry.

As more people begin to understand the importance of taking care of their skin, many are starting to invest more time and money in pursuit of products to support their skincare goals.  For some that may mean actually putting a routine in place where there was none.  For others, that may mean an upgrade to a moisturizer they’ve used for years or adding a sunscreen or eye cream.  If you are a more advanced skincare user, you might also be one to use an essence, serum, peel, mask and an oil.  And, if you are really fancy pants, you might be a jade rolling, micro needling aficionado who has monthly appointments with your facialist.  All in the pursuit of beautiful skin.

That might seem like a of products (or steps) for someone to use on their face.  In some instances it is which is why it’s important to assess what your skin really needs.  Within the various product categories, most, if not all of the skin care products one uses on their skin has multiple benefits because of the many ingredients they are created with.  Nothing is wrong with that if you are getting the results you desire. Many of our favorite skincare brands spend years in research and development to create products that deliver first in class, highly efficacious products.

But then attached to this multi-step, muti-product routine is the all too familiar hefty price tag.  And the fact that you can still be confused about what may or not work best for your particular skin concerns – even after going to a skincare expert, reading multiple articles and reviews or watching YouTube videos.  To ease the pain of the sometimes exorbitant price tag, there is always the option of going to the local drug store to purchase your skin care.  But have you noticed that even drugstore brands are becoming more advanced, complex and expensive?

With that being said, many people are not opposed to using a $200 serum if it really works.  But what if there is a single ingredient product that gets right down to the heart of your skincare needs?  And what if that single (or fewer) ingredient item costs significantly less than its counterpart where a particular hero ingredient shares space with other active ingredients that your skin may not need at the moment?

Welcome to the trend of what has been considered fast skincare.  Fast skincare usually features a single or hero ingredient and a focus on customization without the hefty price tag.  With customization as one of the key components of this newer trend in skincare, customers know what they are purchasing, are able to target a specific concern and can use in addition to the products they are already using – thus allowing one to address their skin’s ever changing needs without the high price.  Why is this trend considered fast skincare?  Because there are shorter R & D times.  With shorter R & D times, the average product turnaround, from concept to production to market is about 18 weeks vs 18 months – a concept similar to fast fashion.  That, in addition to leveraging the power of social media and using simplistic packaging that’s still Instagram worthy allows brands to come to market faster and get in the hands of consumers ASAP.  Below are 4 brands that fall into the category of fast or less expensive targeted skincare with a single/hero ingredient.

The Ordinary.  Just a few years old, The Ordinary, which falls under the Deciem umbrella, focuses on “clinical formulations with integrity”.   This results driven skin care line is very affordable with prices starting at $6 and is free of parabens, sulfates and mineral oils.  It is still important to know your ingredients – the varying percentages and various ingredients can leave one confused.  It’s almost like staring at a chemistry exam.

Versed Skincare.  Versed Skincare is Who What Wear‘s sister brand and has 19 essential products under $20 that cleanse, seal, boost or treat.  There is a line up of serums, oils, cleansers and peels, all of which are vegan and cruelty free – products are only tested on humans.  The simplistic packaging features pastel colors with symbols that speak to the function or focus of the product:  hourglass – aging, bulls eye – target, sun-dullness and is definitely Instagram worthy.

Good Molecules.  Good Molecules is created by Beautylish as a budget friendly brand.  Products are fuss free and start at $6.  Rest assured that the ingredients are up to standard as this product line was created by beauty industry veterans.  They have worked directly with top labs to create products that address texture, acne, dryness and hyperpigmentation with easy to understand terms.

The Inkey List.  UK based brand The Inkey List focuses on 15 hero ingredients – all $15 and under.  Created by former Boots branding and product development team Colette Newberry and Mark Curry, their focus is on simplifying popular skin care terms.  The Inkey List includes skincare heavy hitters such as retinol, salicylic acid and vitamin C and is cruelty free.  They do not work with suppliers who animal test and they do not enter into any test market where there is no alternative to animal testing.  They also have an environmental and sustainability policy  and are making an effort to source ingredients from sustainable sources.

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How To Pack Efficiently For Travel

In travel on August 12, 2019 at 10:21 am

Image Courtesy of Lucas França/Pexels

Going on an extended vacation or short trip can, for the most part, be exciting.  Packing for said vacation or trip on the other hand can sometimes be frustrating, especially if you haven’t cultivated packing a suitcase into an art form.

Packing strategically and efficiently for your travels can be the difference between having everything you need versus leaving items behind and having to make multiple trips to the convenience store or mall to replace items you forgot.  Strategic and efficient packing can also ensure that your items are organized and in good condition upon arrival.  Below are several tips, tools and techniques to help you navigate the task of packing for your travels.

  • Roll Don’t Fold.  How many times have you packed your suitcase only to reach your destination with clothes that have more wrinkles than a bulldog’s face?  We’ve all been there.  Rolling your clothes does two things: it helps to minimize wrinkles and rolled clothes can help maximize space in your suitcase.  When shopping in general and packing specifically, choose clothing in fabrics that tend to resist wrinkles.  If your clothes still have a few wrinkles after you arrive at your destination, try hanging your clothes in the bathroom while you shower and/or use a de-wrinkler for moderate wrinkles. 
  • Use packing tools such as packing cubes (great for rolling) and packing envelopes/folders (great for things like button downs which are better folded). These are also great tools to use to help keep your suitcase/travel bag organized.  You can organize based on undergarments (underwear, socks, hosiery), occasion (sports, dinner, events), day of the week and even color palette – whichever works for you.
  • Have a separate bag for soiled items.  Also, to keep things smelling fresh, use a sachet or even a dryer sheet inside of your luggage.
  • Begin and end with a packing list of items that you can always refer to when traveling.  This way you can plan before you pack.  This is also great if you are one to pack hours before your flight – you decrease the chance of you forgetting something important like your toothbrush or medication.
  • Use a toiletry bag (or Dopp kit).  Make sure you use TSA approved bottles to keep your skin/hair care in.  If you travel often, don’t unpack as you are less likely to forget these items.  TIP:  don’t fill the bottles all the way.  Storage areas of planes are not pressurized and can cause liquids to overflow if the bottle is filled all of the way.  Also, as a precaution, put bottles in a zip lock bag just in case something leaks so you won’t have a bigger mess than anticipated.  You can also put a small piece of plastic over the opening of containers to minimize spillage in case the top comes off.  Add a cotton round to items like foundation compacts to absorb shock and prevent breaking.
  • Leave extra space in your luggage for things you may purchase while traveling.  Also since most suitcases are upright, when packing, put heavier items at the bottom near the wheels to prevent the luggage from tipping over.
  • Keep jewelry from getting tangled by folding items like necklaces in gift tissue paper or 2 sheets of plastic wrap.  If you’re not one to keep the postcard that earrings come on when you purchase them, you can always use an index card or buttons to keep earrings (particularly studs) together.  Use a travel box, jewelry bag or small cosmetics case/bag to keep bangles and rings together.  You can also stuff these items in shoes to maximize space.
  • Use handbag dusters, large zipLock bags or even inexpensive shower caps to keep shoes from touching.
  • Put an identifying mark on luggage and travel bags for easier identification and pick up at baggage claim.  There is nothing more nerve wracking than to wait at baggage claim and realize that several other people have the same or similar luggage as you do.  This increases the chance of hurriedly grabbing someone else’s belongings and taking off in a hurry.  Use a brightly colored ID tag, sticker or even a ribbon to clearly mark your belongings.
  • Always pack an extra change of clothes, particularly underwear as well as important items such as medicine, feminine care, mints, snacks and ID in your carry onjust in case you and your luggage don’t arrive at the same time and place.
  • Wear your bulkiest clothes during travel so as not to take up all the room in your suitcase.
  • Know your airlines baggage fees so you can budget for it and not be surprised when you get to the airport.
  • Keep photos of ID and travel documents in your cell phone just in case you misplace these actual items.
  • Use a gadget organizer for things like chargers and earphones/EarPods.

Do you have a favorite hack that makes packing for travel easier?  Please leave your comment below.

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Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Needs In Her Closet

In fashion, style on July 18, 2019 at 7:40 am


Have you ever looked in your closet and felt like you had a closet full of nothing to wear?  Perhaps you had an interview or dinner to attend and an in a panic went shopping for the “right” outfit.  We have all been there.

Every season we are inundated with the hottest and newest trends off the runway that we are convinced we must have.  While there is absolutely nothing wrong with indulging in said hot trends, it is important to have key or staple items in your closet.  Doing so will be be the difference between feeling like you have nothing to wear and feeling (and being) ready for almost anything.  This concept is also helpful when building or updating your wardrobe and although staples items (and colors) will vary from person to person, the right pieces increase wardrobe functionality as well as creativity when planning outfits.  

Below are 19 essential pieces to add to your wardrobe if you don’t already own them:

  • Jumpsuit.  This one piece can be styled multiple ways, and, depending on the material, can be worn year round.  Pair it with a blazer and pumps/loafer for work or strappy sandals and a clutch for a night out on the town.
  • Lightweight Neutral Blazer.  A blazer can be worn with anything at anytime.  Great for layering over a sheath dress or for wearing with a t-shirt and jeans/skirt.  A tuxedo styled blazer adds instant elegance if you are heading out after work or if you prefer to wear something that is edgy yet professional.  If suits are not your thing, it can still be a good idea to invest in one because you don’t have to wear it together but you can instead take the pieces and incorporate them into other parts of your wardrobe to create other looks.
  • Denim Jacket.  Denim jackets are great for in between temperatures or for when you want an outfit to take on a more casual vibe.
  • Leather Jacket. There is nothing like a leather jacket to add a nice edge to your wardrobe. Leather jackets are great for fall weather and look great with a scarf and of course a great pair of sunglasses.
  • The LBD (Little Black Dress).  It goes without saying that having an LBD (or two) in your closet will keep you ready for a multitude of occasions.  Know your shape for the perfect silhouette.  Keep in mind that styles such as the wrap dress is simple yet elegant and is flattering on most body types.
  • Dark Wash Jeans.  Creates a look that is polished and can take you from casual to elegant depending on what you pair them with.  Keep it simple by avoiding distressed styles which can distract from a clean, polished look especially if you are in a casual “professional” setting.  Pair with a chic blazer or blouse for work and a sequinned top and stilettos for a night out on the town.  If you want an option that is more dressy, consider a high rise, flare leg silhouette in a more flowy denim material.
  • Basic White T-Shirt/Tank top/button down.  These are great foundation pieces that create endless options for anytime and anywhere.  In addition to your basic round or v-neck t shirts, add one in a silky material or with embellishment for a dressy look.  Other basic colors to include in your wardrobe:  black, grey, and cream.
  • Black trousers and black pencil skirt.  Both are great pieces to take you from work to play and can be paired with various tops and accessories.  Again it is important to know your shape to find your perfect silhouette.
  • Hats and Head Wraps.  These items aren’t only for not so perfect hair days but can be that one piece that takes your outfit to the next level.  Include styles such as a classic straw hat and fedora as well as head wraps in black, leopard and pops of color.
  • Kimonos.  Nothing takes a simple outfit like jeans/shorts and tank top to the next level like a kimono.  Explore a variety of textures, colors, and prints to include in your wardrobe.  Want to level up your look, add a belt, head wrap and a nice pair of shoes/sandals to make your look top notch.
  • Pump.  A simple pump can take you from work to play and can be paired with almost anything. A platform pump is a great middle ground and creates great structure for many looks, including wide leg pants.  Pointy toe pumps make the legs look longer and leaner.
  • Loafer. An excellent alternative if heels are not your thing or for when you cant take another step in those pumps.  Opt for loafers in various skins (alligator), colors such as oxblood or even leopard print which can add a little pizzazz to an otherwise neutral outfit.
  • Sneaker/Slip on.  This footwear choice can be a more casual or sporty/athletic alternative to the above mentioned loafer or an addition to your shoe wardrobe.
  • Tote Bag and Clutch.  A roomy, well constructed tote bag is essential for carrying your belongings while on the go.  A basic clutch is the perfect add on for when you don’t want to carry everything you normally carry in your tote or for when you need to make that quick transition from work to play.

What are some of your favorite wardrobe staples?  Do you have go to pieces to keep you looking stylish or do you find that you have some opportunities in your wardrobe?  Please share your thoughts below.

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Elevate Your Skincare Game With The Power Of Retinoids

In beauty, skincare on May 30, 2019 at 11:15 pm

Retinols, which are a form of retinoids, have long been the go to when it comes to skincare multi-tasking and anti-aging.  Considered to be the gold standard in skincare, retinoids are like your big sister who can do it all.  Retinoids have been around since the 70’s and were originally prescribed for acne concerns because they help to slough off dead skin and clear pores. Dermatologists and patients began to see that with regular use skin was more clear and smooth, with fewer pimples and less discoloration.  Skin looked better overall.

What Is A Retinoid And Where Does It Come From?
To first understand what a retinoid is and what it does, it is important to understand where retinoids come from.  Retinoids are derived from Vitamin A which occurs naturally in the body and can also be found in animal or plant sources.  Vitamin A is important because it is responsible for things like good vision and healthy bones as well as healthy cell turnover and collagen production.  

The term retinoid is the category name or umbrella under which the terms retin-a and retinol fall under.  Retin-A (aka tretinoin) is available with a prescription.  Retinol, the more common form of retinoid, is known by more familiar terms such as retinol palmitate, retinol acetate and retinol linoleate.  These forms tend to be more gentle and are a perfect introduction into the world of retinoids.   Retinols don’t need a prescription and can be found over the counter – in your favorite beauty stores.

How Do Retinoids Work And How Are They Different Than AHA’s And BHA’s? 

Retinoids, which work in the deeper layers of the skin, help to reduce the appearance of fine line, wrinkles, discoloration and enlarged pores.  They also help with cell renewal and collagen production.  The later two functions are important to note as they relate to anti-aging concerns because when you reach the age of 30, cell renewal begins to slow down, occurring evey 60 days or so as opposed to every 28-30 days when in your twenties. Slower cell turnover leads to dull, lackluster, congested skin.   In addition, collagen production, which is responsible for giving our skin, bones and connective tissues the structure they need, also begins to decline as well when we age.  This reduction in collagen production is responsible for fine lines, deep wrinkles and sagging, less plump skin. Retinoids work to increase skin thickness and elasticity in the deeper layers where wrinkles begin.  They also slow down the breakdown of collagen and curb the production of melanin (brown spots).

So what is the difference between retinoids, AHA’s and BHA’s?  AHA’s work on the surface of the skin to improve what we see while BHA’s work just below the skin’s surface.  Retinoids affect the deeper layers of the skin to push out permanently better skin and are more effective in the long run. 

How Does One Incorporate Retinoids Into Their Skincare Routine?

Start slowly and follow the directions of the brand you choose.  Directions usually instruct to use every other evening or 1-2x weekly, eventually working your way up to every evening.  Always use a sunscreen and keep in mind that results can take anywhere from 3-6 months of regular use to really see results.

What Are The Possible Side Effects Of Retinol Use?  What Precautions Should One Take When First Using Retinol?

Possible drying, peeling, or redness.  However, the new generation of retinoids deliver the same results with less irritation because these formulations include ingredients such as honey and jojoba to help soothe and calm irritation.   If you do experience any side effects, you can reduce dosage/usage but don’t stop completely because you won’t see the benefits.  Make sure you are using a moisturizer/oil to keep the skin hydrated and to counteract any possible irritation associated with retinol use.  Don’t use if you are breastfeeding or pregnant. 

Differin Gel.  Once available only with a prescription, Differin gel is the first FDA approved retinoid gel approved for over the counter use for the treatment of acne.  Differin gel contains adapalene, a form of retinoid that treats/clears acne.  Available in a 30 day and 90 day supply and has an accompanying cleanser and moisturizer. The highest dose still requires a prescription (.3% adapalene)

Peter Thomas Roth Pro Strength 3% Retinoid Plus.  Perfect for normal, oily, combination and dry skin, this lightweight serum helps to get rid of the signs of aging.  A key ingredients include caffeine which helps with penetration and the buffering complex of symitive 1609 and symcalmin to calm irritation.

Dermalogica Age Reversal Eye Complex.   This vegan, gluten-free eye cream is microencapsulated, ensuring potency of the retinol as well as better absorption into the skin.  Niacinimide, vitamin C and peptides help to ensure hydration, reduction of dark circles and plumping of fine lines.

Darphin Ideal Resource Youth Retinol Concentrate.  Infused with nourishing botanicals, this retinol encourages cell turnover, moisturizes and is perfect for face and eye.  To preserve potency and protect from light damage, this retinol concentrate is housed in individual opaque capsules.

RoC Retinol Correxion Deep Wrinkle Night Cream.  This cream has the highest strength of retinol available without a prescription and works overnight to help reduce the signs of aging with pure RoC Retinol and an essential mineral complex.

Paula’s Choice 1% Retinol Booster. This lightweight fluid is a slow release retinol that actually boosts the efficacy of your other skincare products such as serums and moisturizers.  It also helps to even skin tone and improve radiance.  Can also be used alone.

Sunday Riley A+ High-Dose Retinol Serum.   This serum which is perfect for normal, dry, combination and oily skin contains a 6.5% blend of retinoid ingredients to fight the signs of aging as well as Hawaiian white honey, bisabolol and ginger to help balance and soothe the skin.

Drunk Elephant A-Passioni Retinol Cream.  The key ingredients of Vitamin F, triple peptide blend and Retinol 1% work together to help target UV damage and other signs of aging while helping to firm and smooth the skin.

Are you a retinol user or is it something you have considered adding to your skin care routine but haven’t done so yet? Leave your comments below.

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8 Reasons Why You Don’t Work Out (And How To Overcome Them)

In fitness, Health on February 18, 2019 at 7:48 pm

selective focus photography of woman in white sports brassiere standing near woman sitting on pink yoga mat

Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

So you want to start working out to get in shape and be healthier but the thought of working out brings you a type of mental anguish that you would rather avoid. You want to start working out but the thought of having to fit this new lifestyle habit into your already hectic schedule is downright annoying. You might even think that working out is a reality out of reach, that it will take forever to see results, and besides, you don’t even know where to start.  But the writing is on the wall: perhaps you have been feeling sluggish lately, or maybe you picked up a few extra pounds during the holidays and your clothes don’t fit like they used to. Whatever the case, any attempt you’ve made in the past has been met with failure, leading you choose not to do anything and avoid the topic altogether.

Then there are the excuses and rationalizations – all of which are plenty and seem legitimate. Sure, you have heard about the multiple benefits of working out/getting in shape such as slowing the aging process, glowing skin and lower risk of cardiovascular disease and other disorders. It’s also great for better cognitive process/brain function and overall better physicality.  These benefits are great but you’re still on the couch with your excuses and rationalizations and you feel  powerless and unaccomplished.  But it’s ok because you can win when it comes to getting fit.  Below are some of the common reasons people have for not made for not working out and solutions to help you overcome them.

I Don’t Have Time/I’m Too Busy.  You may actually have more time than you think.  Is it that you don’t have time or is it that your health is not a priority?  How much time do you spend watching television?  Talking on the phone?  Shopping online?  Stalking social media?  See – you do have time!  Just like you have a set time for your other activities, set aside some time for fitness. The truth of the matter is that you do not have to spend hours upon hours in the gym.  There are plenty of workouts you can do, at the gym or in the privacy of your own home that are quick and effective.  For instance, you can get a good kettlebell workout done in about 20 minutes.  It’s a great form of resistance cardio that will get your blood pumping and help build and strengthen muscles.  If you only have about 10 minutes, an 8 minute tabata workout will have you feeling (and sweating profusely) like you worked out for 30 minutes. Whatever your time factor is, there is always something you can do.  The bottom line is to get moving, even if you walk around your neighborhood or apartment complex when starting out.  Taking baby steps builds upon taking bigger steps.  Also, if you have a hectic schedule like many people do, consider working out first thing in the morning.  Doing so will wake you up and get your blood flowing which leads to more energy and you will start your day feeling amazing.

People Are Watching Me/Judging Me.  Newsflash: no matter what you do and where you are people will always watch, stare and judge. It’s rude, annoying and can definitely make you feel self-conscious. With that said, even if people are looking at you, they are still most likely more concerned about themselves in a self-conscious kind of way.  If you are working out in a gym or some other fitness studio, get focused on why you are there, put on some cute workout gear and some big headphones, turn up the volume and get in the zone. Bring a workout buddy if you need to. And if working out in public causes you too much anxiety (which is totally legitimate) you can always work out at home.

I Don’t Have Money.  To be honest, it doesn’t take a lot of money to get fit.  If going to the gym is your thing, gym memberships vary in price from $20 and up.  That cost depends on what you are looking for in a gym.  Other options would be at home gym programs such as Daily Burn, The Hollywood Trainer Club, and Beachbody that you can stream. These programs are great for those who want to supplement what they do at the gym, don’t know what or when to do certain exercises or who don’t want to go to the gym at all.  Online gyms are run by certified fitness instructors who provide various types of workouts for all levels and all interests for a low monthly/yearly cost.  There is also great content on YouTube from which you can create a fitness calendar.  If you need lightweight equipment such as dumbbells, kettlebells, resistance bands, and jump ropes, you can purchase from places such as TJMaxx, Marshall’s and Five Below. As always, check with your health care professional before starting any type of program.

It’s No Fun/It’s Boring.  You have to find what excites you and that sometimes comes from trial and error.  Running may not be your thing but dancing might be.  You might not be coordinated enough to get those dance moves but kickboxing excites you.  Take some different classes and experiment.  With so many types of workouts out there you are bound to find something you like.

It’s hard/I Will Be Sore.  Sounds cliche but with anything worth having you have to work at it.  The hardest part is getting started.  And yes there are workouts that will challenge you physically but that’s a good thing because it will eventually make you stronger, faster, as well as increase stamina and endurance.  In addition, with any workout program you do, it’s important to incorporate warm up and cool down, keep proper form,  take rest and recovery days to help prevent injury, so on and so forth.  Besides, once you get into a fitness routine you enjoy, you may even derive somewhat of a perverse pleasure from the soreness you feel a day or two after a new/grueling workout.

I Don’t Have Enough Room.  Well, unless you are running a marathon in your living room, you don’t need excessive amounts of room. Yes you might have to move a coffee table or a chair but that’s a small price to pay for getting fit in the privacy of your own home.

I’m Tired.  Is it that you are tired or that you don’t have enough energy?  If you are tired, you probably should get more rest.  If lack of energy is your concern, working out can be a great way to increase your energy.

I Will Just Quit/I Never See Results.  Oftentimes, when beginning a workout program (or anything new for that matter), people tend to bite off more than they can chew (no pun intended).  The key is to start small, be consistent and work your way up to longer and more challenging workouts.  You also need to understand what your fitness goals are.  Is it to loose fat, build muscle, or sculpt and tone?  This will also help determine what your workouts and eating plan will look like.  In addition, you must determine what success looks like for you.  And give yourself time.  The results you are looking for don’t come overnight.  Keep going.

Will it always be easy to get up and work out?  Will you always be motivated?  No and no.  But by creating habits, and becoming disciplined, strategic and consistent, the journey to getting fit and staying fit becomes smoother and you become stronger both mentally and physically.  You will also be able to sidestep your emotions when the going gets tough.  You can do it!!!

Be sure to check with your healthcare professional before starting any fitness program.

Do you workout on the regular or have you struggled with starting/maintain a fitness program?  Leave your comments below.

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How To Receive A Gift You Don’t Like

In etiquette, gift giving, holiday, how to on January 31, 2019 at 12:04 pm

The holidays are over but throughout the year you might find yourself on the receiving end of gifts you aren’t too fond of.

We have all been there:  It’s gift exchange time or some other occasion during the year and you receive a gift prompting an immediate roller coaster of negative emotion, causing you to think:

  • “What the hell?”
  • “What were you thinking?”
  • “Are you serious?”
  • “Going in the trash.”
  • “This relationship is over.”

When you receive a gift that is less than desirable, it can make you wonder if the giver put any consideration into what they were giving you.  It is possible the gift giver is clueless, doesn’t have good taste or they just don’t care.  However, the fact of the matter is that many people struggle with giving meaningful gifts and most likely put a lot of thought and effort into selecting the gifts they give.

Whatever the case, it’s important not to offend the gift giver.  It’s never ok to be rude and instead it’s important to be gracious and show appreciation for what you receive, even if it isn’t what you would have chosen for yourself. If you struggle with how to react when receiving a gift you don’t particularly care for, keep the following in mind when it comes to navigating the murky waters of undesirable gift receiving:

Take a deep breath, smile and say thank you. As mentioned before, you don’t want to offend the gift giver so it is important to quickly manage your facial expression and thoughts to mask any negative emotion you might feel.  If you are used to Aunt Janet giving you cat socks for every milestone in your life even though you like birds and you never wear socks, then you know how to do this but if you are doing a gift exchange with someone new, you might need to practice the rapid fire smile and thank you.  You might even throw in a hug to give yourself time to recover before you face the person again.

Don’t gossip about the gift.  Keep discussion about the gift to a minimum, especially if you are around the person (perhaps at a gathering). Word travels fast and you don’t want to cause trouble –  even though you are troubled by what you received.

React to the thought of the gift.  Keep in mind that most people have the best of intentions when giving you a gift.  It’s also important to not let negative emotion overrule all manners and sense of decorum, especially when it’s someone who cares for you.  Instead, respond to the spirit of the gift.

Deflect attention away from the gift.  If the giver continues to press you for your thoughts about the gift, you can always say something like

  • “Thank you.  I appreciate it.”
  • “I’m not sure how I’m going to use this but I’m definitely going to put this to good use.”
  • “Do you have one? How do you use it?”

Re-gift with caution.  If you store the gift away for later, put the date and the name of the person who gave it to so you don’t give it back to them at a later date.  Hopefully that same gift won’t come back to them in the future from someone else you re-gifted to.

How should you react if you receive a gift that that is offensive such as something with racial undertones, is sexist or doesn’t support a personal journey (you are working towards sobriety and the person gifts you alcohol)?  You are within your right to politely tell them how you feel about the gift they have given you.

Now…

What if you are someone who is challenged and misses the mark when it comes to gift exchange?  If that’s you, keep these 6 points in mind to help you be a better gift giver.

Pay attention.  Take note of what the recipient buys for themselves, their personal style, what they talk about, even how they decorate.  This type of information can give you some insight into what they might like to receive as a gift.

Give gifts around their hobby or interest. For instance if the person you are shopping for is an avid gamer, instead of or in addition to getting them the newest game, consider getting them a gaming chair.

Ask.  Simply put, it never hurts to ask what a person wants for themselves.

Take yourself out of the equation. Remember that the gift isn’t for you so if your Uncle James loves collecting ashtrays from the 1920’s then go ahead, make the man’s day and get him those rusty ashtrays.

Don’t give anything that is used.  It’s poor taste and makes you look very bad, especially if the item looks, smells or feels used.

Give money or a gift card.  There are many schools of thought regarding giving money or gift cards as gifts.  The prevailing thought is that it is not very thoughful or personal.  I believe it depends on the relationship between the giver and the receiver and chances are you’ve never met anyone who didn’t like to receive cold hard cash as a gift.   Giving money/gift cards can often empower someone to purchase things for themselves that they normally wouldn’t purchase for themselves. Which can be a gift in and of itself.